Articles: Building your Singles Ministry by Kris Swiatocho, Director

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Keeping the Vision of Leadership

by Kris Swiatocho, The Singles Network Ministries Director
Recently, I had the privilege of ministering in Corinth, Greece, alongside the remarkable leader Natassa Papada. Natassa leads a dynamic ministry that encompasses her church, outreach to women, support for single mothers, and services for the Gypsy community. Our paths first crossed a few years ago while I was working with a church in Athens, and we immediately sensed that the Lord had united us for a purpose.

We share many similarities, including our commitment to building ministries, our experiences as single, never-married women, and our journeys through similar life stages. Natassa is, without a doubt, one of the most passionate people I have ever met. She works tirelessly to maintain the vision and fulfill what God has called her to do. Her family and friends tell me they don’t know what keeps her going. She has relentless energy and never gives up, no matter her circumstances. She knows—it’s all for God, by Him, and through Him.

During my recent trip to Corinth, I was inspired by Natassa and the qualities that make her a true leader, contributing significantly to her success in fulfilling God’s calling.

Natassa is undeniably one of the most passionate individuals I have ever encountered. She tirelessly dedicates herself to the vision God has placed in her heart, working relentlessly to bring it to fruition. Those who know her—friends and family alike—are often in awe of her boundless energy and steadfast perseverance, regardless of her challenges. She possesses an unwavering conviction that every effort she makes is for God, empowered by Him and through Him. Her commitment is not just admirable; it is a powerful testament to the impact one person can have when they are truly devoted to their calling.

What drives her to keep going as she approaches 60 years of age? How does she navigate life with limited funds and resources? How does she persist in a country where evangelical churches are scarce, and the dominant religion dismisses her as a “real” Christian simply because she has chosen a different path?
  1. Staying close to God: Natassa cultivates a profound connection with God, dedicating the first moments of each day solely to Him. She passionately believes that without this divine guidance, she could not effectively fulfill her ministry. By remaining attuned to His direction and instructions, she is empowered to recognize when she is veering off course or when God calls her to make adjustments, whether that means adding or removing individuals from her path. This closeness frees her from the fear of change and fills her with a deep sense of peace during those transitions. She understands that this is God’s ministry and that He holds the ultimate authority over her life. Embracing this truth lifts a tremendous weight off her shoulders, allowing her to serve with greater confidence and purpose in her ministry.

    Colossians 4:2 Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.

  2. Binding the Enemy: I’ve witnessed how she navigates adversity with remarkable grace. She expertly distinguishes between the enemy’s tactics and life’s challenges, knowing precisely how to confront the former. Moreover, she recognizes that not every hardship originates from Satan; some are divine trials meant to fortify our character during difficult times and in challenging relationships. These challenges serve as tests, revealing how we respond and whether we truly trust God. Personally, I tend to react impulsively in the face of adversity, yet I realize that I have much to learn from Natassa. I need to develop the patience to pause, pray, and thoughtfully identify the root of my struggles.

    John 16:33 I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

  3. Invite others for the journey: Natassa understands that she cannot navigate this journey alone and believes wholeheartedly that God calls us to invite others to join us. God did not save us to leave us isolated; He wants us to grow and empower others to do the same. Furthermore, He encourages us to support those with their own visions and dreams, working alongside them to fulfill His purpose. Natassa knows that not everyone will share her deep passion for the Gypsies, nor will everyone feel called to start a church or lead a Bible study. However, the only way to find out is to reach out and extend an invitation. While we can't control how others respond, God expects us to take the initiative and ask, trusting that the final decision rests with them and Him. Let us be bold in inviting others; it’s a chance for profound transformation for them and for us.

    2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

Natassa is surrounded by committed leaders and passionate supporters who share and believe in the vision God has entrusted to her. Together, they are united in this mission, and it’s inspiring to think that one day, one of them may step up to lead the ministry, continuing the impactful legacy she has begun.

I am truly honored to be part of the transformative work in Greece and eagerly anticipate the exciting next steps for both of us.
 
©2025 KrisSwiatochoMinistries.org • TheSinglesNetwork.org

Leadership by Legacy: Building Singles Ministry

By Kris Swiatocho, The Singles Network Director
“I've had enough. I'm going to quit. I’m so tired of these singles. They don't commit to anything. They don't show up. They are only focused on getting married. On top of all this, my pastor doesn't seem to care. My church thinks singles have leprosy, and heaven forbid they ever become one. Jesus, I feel so alone in leading these singles. I feel so alone in ministering to them. Help! Help!”
 
Does this sound familiar? Do you ever just want to quit leading singles? I have been leading, teaching, or ministering to singles my entire adult life. And since I am single, I can be the first to admit that we can be a big pain in the behind, but so can married people. Many believe that singles are the ones who don't commit or follow through or that we have relationship issues (of course, that is why we are not married). However, I have learned over the years in ministry that there is only one difference between married people and singles: married people tend to address most of their relational issues before coming to church.
 
I know because I see couples arguing in their cars as the leader of the first-impression ministry at my church. They point fingers, yell, and even cry, among other things. But as soon as they open the car doors, the smiles appear, and they skip across the parking lot as if nothing is wrong. Their marriages, kids, and jobs seem perfect. Singles, lacking this blissful marriage, often bring all their problems to church, which is where their family is (or should be). Therefore, it appears that singles have a lot of issues. We seem unhealthy, unwilling to commit, and overly focused on marriage (heaven forbid we want to meet our spouse at church). As a result, my role as a singles leader can feel overwhelming. So, how did Jesus manage all those disciples and their issues? What about the crowds who followed him? 
 
Well, Jesus taught his disciples and followers, like Paul, many things by example, including the importance of staying focused on the prize of bringing people to Christ. I love that Paul once persecuted Christians only to be saved and then dedicated the rest of his life to the opposite cause. Paul utilized his previous experiences as a leader and combined them with his new walk with Christ to reach and build the church. However, like many leaders, Paul faced frustrations—Christians who were not unified, leaders who considered quitting, and ministries that were falling apart. Paul, a man who modeled his life after Christ, learned how to persist in the struggle. Single like Jesus, Paul experienced the challenges of dealing with people, both single and married, as he tried to keep them encouraged and unified. And you know what? Sometimes it worked.
 
We begin with Paul writing from Macedonia, aiming to encourage the Corinthian churches by sharing what the churches there are doing.
 
And now, brothers, we want you to know about the grace that God has given the Macedonian churches. Out of the most severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity. For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege of sharing in this service to the saints. And they did not do as we expected, but they gave themselves first to the Lord and then to us in keeping with God's will. So we urged Titus, since he had earlier made a beginning, to bring also to completion this act of grace on your part. But just as you excel in everything—in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in complete earnestness and in your love for us—see that you also excel in this grace of giving. I am not commanding you, but I want to test the sincerity of your love by comparing it with the earnestness of others. For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich. And here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter: Last year you were the first not only to give but also to have the desire to do so. Now finish the work, so that your eager willingness to do it may be matched by your completion of it, according to your means. For if the willingness is there, the gift is acceptable according to what one has, not according to what he does not have. Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality. At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little" (2 Corinthians 8:1-15).

Paul has given us a glimpse of how we can be encouraged to do God's work and how to encourage others.

1. Keep doing the work of the Lord.
Out of the most severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity (2 Corinthians 8:1-2).

Like the Macedonians, we are in a world, a country, and perhaps a ministry that isn't doing so well (at least, in our perception). Despite what we see that isn't working, we must focus on what is. God is still in control. Remember the old song, "Count Your Blessings, Name Them One by One." Perhaps it’s time to sit down and write out the many things your ministry is doing well. List the singles whose lives have changed. I keep track of the emails, texts, and personal notes from singles who thank me for helping them. Then, every so often, I reflect, allowing the Lord to remind me of what I am doing right.

Also, please know that even when times seem harsh, and our ministries aren't growing the way we think they should be, this could be a time of testing by God, and God wants to make some changes. Pray, ask the Lord for direction, and be ready to do what he asks (even if it means letting go or starting over).

2. Give, not knowing where it goes.
For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege of sharing in this service to the saints (2 Corinthians 8:3-4).

As a leader, you must adopt the mindset of "giving the ministry away." You cannot teach, guide, or lead singles without expecting someone to leave you at some point. I know that once your team is built, some may get married or choose to quit. Yes, it’s very frustrating. However, this is what ministry is all about. I have learned to pour out without worrying about where it all goes. Building leaders is a daily duty. Healthy singles will get married, move into other roles at the church, or relocate. You will be left with healthy individuals who stay in singles ministry, while others may never become healthy. So, if you aren't continuously growing new leaders, the unhealthy singles may take over. This single can drain you, break you, and make you want to quit. One note of hope: as you build and equip leaders for whatever area of ministry God is calling them to, God is doing the same elsewhere, and those singles will show up at your church. Just pray and have faith that God will bring them.

3. Seek God’s direction first and then others.
And they did not do as we expected, but they gave themselves first to the Lord and then to us in keeping with God's will (2 Corinthians 8:5).

I can't tell you how many ministries I get hired to speak and conduct training for that have left consistent prayer out of their practices. Sure, they pray in Sunday school or small groups for individuals, but they never seem to collectively pray for the leaders and direction of the ministry. Paul shares how important it is to give ourselves to the Lord first in our walks and then in our ministries. We need to ask for God's guidance on how to lead our ministries, do His will, and then include others because of God's will. Including others means training, growing, sharing, spending time, etc., to reach people for Christ. How can we know what God wants us to do in our ministry without praying?

4. Encourage each other.
So we urged Titus, since he had earlier made a beginning, to bring also to completion this act of grace on your part. But just as you excel in everything—in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in complete earnestness and in your love for us—see that you also excel in this grace of giving. I am not commanding you, but I want to test the sincerity of your love by comparing it with the earnestness of others (2 Corinthians 8:6-8).

Wow, it is essential to encourage our brothers and sisters in Christ. You know how it feels to be discouraged, to want to give up, and to consider quitting. But a simple thank you, we appreciate you, or you helped me can change everything. Don't forget to let your leaders and team know their importance. As you set the example, they will learn how to do it for others (and maybe even toward you).

As a leader, it is essential to be careful in sharing what is happening in our ministries with our pastors and staff. Always highlight what God is doing, leaving complaints for last and only addressing them when necessary. Remember, Christ said the poor will always be with us, which includes poverty in money, health, and emotions. Therefore, focus on what is working and what is positive.

Finally, hold your leaders (and fellow believers) accountable. God has called you be a leader, so lead and be prepared to correct with love. Our team will not know what to change or improve without accountability.

5. Jesus is our example for everything.
For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich. And here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter: Last year you were the first not only to give but also to have the desire to do so. Now finish the work, so your eager willingness to do it may be matched by your completion, according to your means (2 Corinthians 8:9-11).

Jesus, who is single like me (and Paul), is our example for ALL things. He demonstrates how to lead, love, care, and empower others. If we do not consistently follow him, teach others how to follow him and live in the direction he guides us, this life- and our ministry- means nothing. So, be encouraged to know that Jesus has all the answers for your struggles. Whether you need to express an idea or affirmation, turn to Christ.

6. Give out what you have, not what you don’t have.
For if the willingness is there, the gift is acceptable according to what one has, not according to what he does not have. Our desire is not that others might be relieved while you are hard pressed, but that there might be equality (2 Corinthians 8:12-13).

As leaders, we understand the 80/20 rule: 20 percent of the people do 80 percent of the work. However, I would love to challenge this percentage. I do this by spending time with my leaders and team, teaching, growing, and leading by example. I don't wait for people to come to me; I go to them. I enjoy networking with individuals and encouraging them to serve the Kingdom immediately. I strive to help others see what Christ sees. But in all of this, remember that you cannot give from what you do not have or possess. As a leader, knowing your gifts and understanding what you can realistically achieve is essential. Your ministry will only expand as much as your leadership team can manage. It is better to focus on smaller or less extensive ministries than to create a colossal ministry that exhausts you and your team. Do not compare your ministry to others. Do what God has called you to do.

Also, remember that you need time for yourself to rest, refocus, and renew. Set boundaries for yourself and allow your leaders to see those boundaries as an example to follow. Set aside time to get away, whether alone, with your family, or with your team. Note: Not every church is called to have a singles ministry, but all churches are called to minister to singles. Very few churches can support a divorce recovery group, single-parent initiatives, programs for 20-somethings or 60-somethings, missions, monthly events, grief ministry, etc. Pray and ask God what He is leading you, your church, and your ministry to do, and then do it well.

7. Share everything.
At the present time your plenty will supply what they need, so that in turn their plenty will supply what you need. Then there will be equality, as it is written: "He who gathered much did not have too much, and he who gathered little did not have too little" (2 Corinthians 8:14-15).

I love to share what I’ve learned about singles ministry (and ministry as a whole). Just look at my website (TheSinglesNetwork.org) to see what I mean. I know how challenging it is to lead singles and how difficult it is to find resources and training. We must mentor the next generation, teaching everything we know and sharing our experiences. We must share our knowledge, church space, and events. If we pay to bring in a speaker or for training, we should invite other churches to sow into them. Not every church can afford a singles ministry to bring someone in.
 
Additionally, we can share the event's expenses, such as traveling to retreats or conferences, books, Bible studies, etc. There will come a time when you have much to offer and share and when you have less. Please know we are at a critical juncture in our country where singles pastors are being let go faster than they are being replaced. Therefore, the need to teach, educate, encourage, and disciple is high. We must lead and train the next group of individuals leading our singles. Over half of our country is single, yet the church does not reflect this. The need to minister to and reach singles is increasing each day. Start today by sharing all that God has given you and receiving what God wants to provide you.

As a single adult leader or pastor . . .
· You have been positioned to make a difference in people’s lives.
·  You can encourage, inspire, and affirm the direction God has given them.
 
As a single adult ministry . . .
·  You will go through seasons that allow:
·  Change (keeps ministry fresh; it’s a good thing)
· New growth in people, ideas, and direction
· Pruning (gets rid of things that aren’t working from people to ideas)
·  Evaluation of where you are, where you are going, and how to get there
·  Rest and renewal 
 
As an individual . . .
· Don’t miss the journey.
· What are you teaching me, God?
· Am I faithful, teachable, and available?
 
I love leading singles. They are my heart, my breath, and my life. Why? Because Jesus was single like me. Jesus loves singles and is working out His plan in our lives. We are important and matter to this world. So be encouraged, leaders. Take heart that you are doing fantastic work for the Lord. Don't give up until the Lord tells you. Never give up. Never!

Not that I have already obtained all this or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead (Philippians 3:12-13).
 
You can find the study, Jesus, Single Like Me, on this website and Amazon.
 
© 2025 Kris Swiatocho Ministries; www.TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries; www.IntentionalRelationshipSolutions.org

Leaders That Last Curriculum

• Leaders that Last is 6 weeks, 6 topics Curriculum: 
The first 3 weeks that are inward focus towards personal development and last 3 weeks that are outward focus towards building and unifying the team.

• Leaders that Last Curriculum includes:
 A trainers guide with additional questions, icebreaker ideas, small group discussion, and weekly assignments, etc. plus participants outline.

• Leaders that Last Curriculum is a:
Microsoft word document so you can alter to fit your specific group whether young adult, single adult or single parent, divorced or widowed.

WEEKLY TOPICS:
Week 1: Who You Are in Christ
Week 2: Affirming Your Calling as a Leader
Week 3: Spiritual Warfare
Week 4: Mentoring/Finding others with a Similar Calling
Week 5: Building the Team
Week 6: Caring for the Team.

Week 1: Who Am I?
Description: Everything starts and ends with a great team but a team starts with a great leader. A great leader should know who they are in Christ first in order to lead others. This leader also should have a personal, growing relationship with Christ. This lesson will focus on your identity, your personal growth in your faith, and your walk with the Lord.
 
Week 2: Who Ya Going to Call?
Description: Learning and affirming your calling to be a leader. Most maturing Christians are serving the Lord but often in the wrong area, this lesson will help you focus on the right area God is calling you into.
 
Week 3: The Devil Made Me Do It!
Description: This lesson focuses on how to recognize the enemy’s attacks on you, your team, and your ministry, and what to do when it does happen.

Week 4: Making Copies!
Description: This lesson focuses on the importance of recognizing potential leaders by starting with those who are voluntold versus volunteers.

Week 5: There’s No “I” in Team
Description: Everything falls and rises on leadership. Without a great team that is unified in the path to reach the goals God has put in place, leadership will fail. This lesson will focus on how to build a team that builds the ministry.
 
Week 6: Are You a Care Bear?
Description: This lesson focuses on how to keep our team, our leaders, and, ultimately, our ministry going and growing.

Christian Leadership Styles

COG National Conference, Orlando, Fl

Leadership Snippit

Leadership Articles by Kris Swiatocho

Additional resources by Kris and other authors, click here.
Kris holds a singles retreat every September up in the mountains and I’ve attended the last 8 years. The 3rd year, Sept 2017 I came for the leadership portion of the meeting and was inspired by the teaching, many years of experience working with singles, messages shared, stories from other church leaders and resources galore at the meeting and on the website. I left that weekend fired up and it sparked me to start a singles focused bible study at our church which has been running a year now and doing great... I have so many stories I could share... many new visitors/members... connecting with singles in the church that weren’t plugged in.. networking with other Christian groups and churches... things just continue to spiral... we held a singles NYE celebration a few weeks ago. The owner of The Barn Dance (non-alcoholic club) that some of us go to often came. His club was only open on sat night BUT... he was inspired by the number we had at our dance and the amazing community... he had no idea that singles have that much of a need/want to be together. SO tonight he hosted his first Christian Singles Dance Party at The Barn Dance and it was a big hit. Planning to do a monthly dance there.—opening with prayer and ending with praise songs and prayer. I can’t wait to see what God has for us in 2024. Also very excited about this years Singles Retreat! Find info on thesinglesnetwork.org and come join us Thanks Kris for all you do... for your heart for God and singles.
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—Lisa Young, Lawndale Baptist Church, Greensboro, NC