Articles by Kris Swiatocho, Director The Singles Network Ministries

Articles by Kris Swiatocho, Director

Intentional Relationships: 107 Days To Go by Michelle K. Eigemann

Brian Hipp and I had our first official premarital counseling session earlier this week. Before this session, we were given a questionnaire containing 45 questions. We were to answer these questions separately without sharing or discussing our answers. Some sample questions were about characteristics we admire in our future mate and the characteristics we least admire: debt, expectations, and marital roles.

We each filled out our responses and then waited to go over them in counseling. Our answers were so similar that we were asked if we had discussed them.

When Brian and I first began "dating," I was very intentional about asking all those questions. Y'all, I'm 47 years old, and I wasn't messing around. I had no desire to "date" just to "date." I wasn't in need of filling my social calendar, and I didn't want to spend time with someone I wasn't compatible with. I was waiting for my future husband.

Waiting is a verb, and it requires action. Waiting doesn't mean we sit on our couch passively praying for a future spouse. It means we actively begin preparing. I had some past hurts I needed to heal, habits I needed to break, and faulty mindsets I needed to sort out. I knew that until I could work on myself that I wouldn't be any good for someone else. I needed to be willing to look internally and deal with whatever I found there.

My amazing and talented friend Kris Swiatocho wrote a book with co-author Pastor Dan Houk called Intentional Relationships for Singles, and it's good. I mean real good. It forces you to look inward and increase your level of self-awareness because healing is halted until awareness is established.

I used this book as a guide to asking some of those difficult and uncomfortable questions. Brian and I talked openly and authentically, which is why our answers were so similar. We didn't cheat because we'd only be cheating ourselves. We aren't getting married just to get married. We are getting married to allow God to double our serving capacity, strengthen our kingdom reaching ability, and allow our marriage to always point to Jesus.

Check out the Intentional Relationships FB page below.
https://www.facebook.com/IntentionalRelationshipSolutions/

To read more about having an "intentional relationship" with your family, friends, those you work and go to church with including a possible future mate, be sure to purchase your own “Intentional Relationships for Singles” 12- week study. We also encourage you to attend the Labor Day Singles and Leaders Retreat, Sept 2-5th, 2022 in Flat Rock, NC (Mountains) where our theme is Intentional Relationships based on the study.

About Michelle: Michelle wears an array of hats on any given day, but her favorite is Daughter of the King. She lives in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina, where she works as a Child and Family Therapist. She has been a single mother for 18 years and loves to watch God take your most difficult struggles and transform them into passionate purpose. Today Michelle has joyfully embraced her passion for speaking truth into the lives of others and assisting them in finding and living out their true identity in Christ. She believes that we need to uncover the lies and labels, identity the root, and replace it with God's truth.

General Articles/Relationships

107 Days to Go by Michelle Eigemann
Blind Spots, Excerpt, Intentional Relationships for Singles
We Got It All Wrong, Excerpt, Intentional Relationships for Singles
Why Relationships Fail, Excerpt, Intentional Relationships for Singles
Friendzone, Really?
Intentional Dating
Surviving the Holiday's with Pastor Tom Worstell
He's Got This
Dating During COVID
Should I Online Date?
Friendationship
"ALL" Series of Articles
Christmas Story
I Kissed Dating Hello
4 Kinds of Battles Single Encounter, Burmese Language
Do You Want to Be Married? (doc), Single Matters Magazine
Practical Tips in Online Dating
The Best Worse Date
Jesus, Single Like Me: Alone vs. Loneliness
Salt and Life in the Workplace
I Married My Mother, and Now I Want a Divorce, Single Matters Magazine
I Love/Hate About Being Single (includes Spanish)
Why Should I Reconcile When It's So Painful (doc), Crosswalk.com
Gossip versus Venting (doc), Journey Christian News
Restoration (doc), Journey Christian News
Why Am I Single? (doc)Journey Christian News
4 Battles of Singleness (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine
Friendationship: Can You Be More-Than-Friends but Less-Than-Romantic? (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine, Graceful Chic Magazine
Jesus, Single Like Me: He Knew What it Feels to Be Alone (pdf), Overwhelmed Single Mom's Magazine
Singles Life: The Worse and Best Dates (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine
Being Single and Making a Difference (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine
What I Love/Hate About Being Single (doc), Crosswalk Online Magazine
Why Are You Single (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine
I Married My Mother (pdf), Crosswalk Online Magazine

The Women in Christ's Life Series:

The Men in Christ Life Series:

Dear Kris...

Dear Kris: Where are the Men? (doc)
Dear Kris: Separation Issues/Church (pdf)
Dear Kris: Need Ideas CA (pdf)
Dear Kris: I Want to Quit (pdf)
Dear Kris: Starting a Women's Ministry (pdf)
Dear Kris: Online Dating/UK (pdf)

Jesus, Single Like Me Series:

A Fine Line Series:
For a full list of these articles, go to Crosswalk.com

Older printed publications:

Online Dating, Pros and Cons
Article Interview, Florida Baptist Witness, 2015

No Regular Joe
Lifeway Home Magazine, 2014

Vantage Point Article
Christian Single Magazine, Lifeway, 2006

Wisdom Article
Living Solo Magazine, 2003

Standing Up for Singles
Raleigh World, 2003

The Singles Network, Joining Forces To MInister to Singles
Christian Single Magazine, Lifeway, 2003

I first met Kris Swiatocho with The Singles Network Ministries about 3 1/2 years ago when she came to speak at my church. I was fairly new to the church and the Singles Ministry. Since then, I have had the opportunity to hear Kris speak to our Women’s Ministry, Singles Ministry, at a retreat and on two cruises. Kris has a way of sharing God’s Word in a practical way. She is a wonderful example of the boldness we should seek in Christ. I lead groups using her studies as well as the 4th Sunday “Pray for a Mate” time. I have found the studies to be thought provoking for great discussions in my groups as well as personal growth.
—Quaye Berry, Singles Ministry Leader, Tulsa, OK